We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize