At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Randomize
