see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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