just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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