Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
