...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
