normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
