Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
