is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
