I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Randomize
