what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
