physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
