Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize