It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
