so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
