white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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