omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
