so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
We talked him into tasing himself.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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