Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize