You're completely useless in the revolution.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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