i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
