i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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