Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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