words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
