I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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