Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
