bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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