You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
