that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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