I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
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