Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
