wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
