apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
