You really coming over, don't trick.
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
