new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
