Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize