My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
