Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
