how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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