I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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