It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
