nutella sex= disaster
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
