on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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