dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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