What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
