I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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