garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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