will power is for people who don't want to get laid
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize