You're a womanizer and a bitch.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
