You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
