your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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